bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
you are never too drunk for berry picking
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
