Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
