just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
