I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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