you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
