Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
