Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
