fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Randomize
