I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
is wine microwaveable?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize