I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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