You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
