i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I haven't been this sober since birth.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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