I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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