Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
He better not be in your backpack
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
