suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Sext me about skeletons
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
