Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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