im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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