I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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