bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize