So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I puked a lego.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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