she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
