she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
