quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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