I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
