so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Randomize
