i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Randomize
