he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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