He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
you made out with another girl for some wings
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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