so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
