i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Welp...herpes.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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