yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
