well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
