there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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