I'm lost and stupid without you.
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize