they need to just BURY HIM!
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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