I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
