She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Is it because I queefed?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
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