mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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