David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
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