Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
