Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
