for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I'm always down for nudity.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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