So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
He told me they were just razor bumps!
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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