Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize
