you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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