just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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