You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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