I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
