Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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