I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
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