They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
